tales of texting

what is it with text messages? can you not pick up the damn phone and make a call? i just dont get it. in my life currently, there are a handful of males who just do not call. its like text fest 09.  a girl can only respond to so many texts before her head spins off. and really, do you lack the very few human communication skills it requires to successfully complete a phone call? if so, then houston, we have a major problem. there are times when it is appropriate to text. and there are times when you need to be slapped. upon inviting myself into a conversation five of my very brightest, most beautiful student council girls were having, i found out the feeling is mutual. apparently, as young as seventh grade, boys are learning the art of shady texting. the love world is very much in trouble if boys are starting that early. there is absolutely no hope. so in between eating a ridiculous number of homemade cupcakes [thanks ker!] and stringing polar express'esque jingle bells for first graders, we came up with the do's and dont's of texting. my ever-efficient sc secretary a even wrote them down. if i only had a scanner. the stick figure illustrations and icing smudges really add to the professionalism of this very serious document. ha. i couldnt make this shit up if i tried, so here it is, compliments of my girls:

1. texting is not acceptable [or appreciated] as the first form of communication. aka, if you asked someone for their number and have never talked on the phone before, you cant NOT just text them the first time. you need to call.

2. if you receive the text from #1, you can NEVER respond. this just encourages him to never ever call you and continue this texting crap.

3. if he asks you to go somewhere, like the mall, [or in adult life, on a date] through text, you have to ignore it. if you feel like you cant, you should definitely fake other plans. (maybe then hell learn how to call you!)

4. texts are absolutely acceptable when asking one-two questions, responding to a simple thought, or just to say hi and i miss you during work hours.

5. after a relationship is fully formed, texting is totally fine as long as it doesnt end up being the only way you talk to each other.

6. if you ever hear things like "i texted you back babe" or "didnt you get my text?" etc. dump him now! hes lying! its alot easier to lie about texts than phone calls. hmmm think about it.

7. dont ever get into an argument in text messages. it gets waaay too confusing.

8. if youre dating someone (or married), dont let them get lazy. an 'i love you' text does not mean the same as flowers or a nice date. and dont settle for that!

9. [this ones the most important!!!] be strong. if he really wants to talk to you or see you, he needs to show you. if hes only willing to text you, hes not going to try very hard.


omg are you not obsessed with these girls? i think number8 is my fav ha. i swear, i just helped a little. these were their ideas. can you not tell from some of the seventh grade wording? haha i had to leave it as is. i told them theres a future for them in the "hes just not that into" sect of literature. theyre such sweethearts, real good girls. and theyre already dealing with this bull. unfortunately, i had to be the raincloud letting them know it doesnt get any better. which is when i found myself spilling guts to a very entranced group of thirteen year olds. i think it was at this point that i became a cross between their newest charity case and the reigning queen. half of me felt like the girl they make sad eyes at and try to "makeover" after school. the other half felt like i was joan of arc, knocking down walls and opening the portals to the world of love. very superhero.  needless to say, thats when we got to talking about the text debacle. and the lack of communication amongst the boys in our lives. they tried to use the term, men, when talking about my life. bahhh, i almost snorted rootbeer out of my nose. i told them when i actually meet a man, ill let them know.

honestly, it was very refreshing to hear their optimism for my love life. i feel like everywhere i turn lately, people are married, pregnant, buying houses, making a lottt more money than me, and generally living a more adult life. which is awesome for them. but when i think about all the above, i have quite a bit of anxiety about that part of my life. i tend to look to the past instead of the future. at this point last year, i was getting settled into my first really adult home, with the person i thought id spend the rest of my life with. i was beginning my career, taking grad classes, keeping a household, and generally doing very "grown up" things. and then the floor caved out from under me. maybe the timing wasnt right. and maybe we werent right for one another. and maybe none of it would have worked. but it was all i knew for a very long time. and its what was supposed to happen. i never pictured 'what if' the path took a turn. i lost that comfort that my life was moving along like clockwork. that things would end up happily ever after. and every once in awhile, i need a kick. like today, it was nice to know there are people out there, albeit teenagers, who think i have a lot of years to be live it up before i settle down. and i dont care what anyone says, they give good advice. not only did they tell me i have plenty of time to settle down, they made it VERY clear to me that i should not settle, at all. they gave some interesting opinions on the boys in my life. ha, theres a story for another day.

but for those of you stuck in the world of texting tragedies, i hope these words of wisdom from delco's finest helped a little  :)